Nine Lessons
By Erin Deborah Waks
NB All the men featured in this article will remain anonymous. All were informed that the mouthy brunette opposite them was a writer, and would, undoubtedly, share her dating stories with the world. All of them proceeded to take me out willingly. No males were harmed in the making of this article.
They say cats have nine lives, and this kitten-loving girl is coming to the end of nine things that each feel like they’ve given me a whole lifetime of material. Nine of London’s most eligible bachelors (ish?), attempting to wine and dine yours truly.
I’ll let you in on a little secret: every time I do something, I often find myself pondering what I learned from it. It sounds great - like a positive, educational type of self development. Honestly, it’s exhausting. Sometimes I wish I could just do, without all the thinking that comes along with it. Nah. Then what on earth would I write about?
I’ve been right in the depths of my single-girl era, brat winter, hot girl season. Whatever you call it, let’s just say I’ve worn heels more times in the last three months than I can count, met plenty of fabulous boys (and plenty of not-so-fabulous ones) and consumed at least double that number in glasses of wine.
Each date I’ve been on has given me much food for thought. Each night out could have been a whole article in its own right. Some of them certainly will be - watch this space. Each glass of wine I’ve had, either sipping slowly while batting my eyelashes at the unsuspecting male in front of me or downing it quickly with a ‘get me out of here’ text to my pals, has provided me with so much to write about. So, as I reflect on a recent dating rampage, let’s talk. Nine men - naturally, that means nine lessons.
One: There is no time limit on healing. You might just find a perfectly lovely, nice-to-look-at, incredibly smart boy to have on your arm before you know it. It might not last. You might not want it to. But it’s nice to know it’s out there.
Two: It’s really easy to find men who want to sleep with you. Take it or leave it, darling, but the choice is there.
Three: You will make it through the most boring date of your life, largely unharmed. You can talk to even the most dull of human beings.
Four: You don’t need to justify a ‘no’, regardless of what you’ve said ‘yes’ to (and enjoyed saying ‘yes’ to). Even if he love bombs you. Even if he begs.
Five: You need smart. Don’t apologise for it. Some people need tall, financially stable, blue eyes or moustaches. You, my dear, need smart.
Six: Having a great time on a date doesn’t necessarily mean you fancied him. But, frankly, you have enough friends right now.
Seven: Older. Definitely date older.
Eight: You know when you’re interested within about five minutes. You’re hardly ever wrong, even if you give it a try. Trust your gut. If you don’t want him to kiss you, that says enough.
As for number nine? Well, I’m still trying to work out what he’s teaching me.
